Dear Bad Moms

You forgot your kids at school. Again.

You fed them pizza for the 3rd time this week.

You took her to Mother's Day Out just so you could go home and take a nap.

Every day, another mother gets sucked into this whirlpool from hell that tells us that our babies are supposed to never watch TV, should speak in complete sentences by the time they're two, etc etc blah blah blah. None of us are immune from the crusade to be the "perfect mom" that, deep down, we KNOW will never end well. Perfection is such a load of crap. 

Mom guilt has been breathing down my neck since 2013. I've definitely made my share of mistakes with Jordan, both real and imagined. Post partum depression caused me a great deal of crappiness early on in my motherhood. But take it from someone who has accepted the inevitable: YOU'RE A GOOD MOM SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID YOU'RE NOT. The fear that you've somehow messed up your kid is the evidence. It's such a weird concept, and something that I think contributes to those shiny new gray hairs in 20 something and 30 something moms. 

Mom guilt is REAL. Let me repeat myself for the ones who breezed by that and don't want to accept the truth. MOM. GUILT. IS. REAL. This constant nagging in the back of your mind that you have somehow caused this little human to not be his/her best because you were crazy enough to give them boundaries, rules and punishments is REAL. I pray at least once a week that anything I've said or done to keep Jordan alive and well doesn't manifest into some crazy addiction or anything I've ever seen on Criminal Minds or, God forbid, Law and Order SVU. These little sponges that soak up our traits and some of our faults are ever evolving, and the fear that you have in some way dinged up this shiny new person is, in my opinion, a huge cause of overprotection. You don't want anything bad to happen, so you don't let anything happen. That is, until that kid escapes your clutches at 18 and loses their sh*t in college. Have you ever watched those shows where the Amish kids get their time to experience the outside world before deciding if they want to continue being Amish or stay gone forever, and some of the kids get drunk on the freedom (and liquor)? I think it's like that. And I, for one, don't want those problems.

Think about it like this: is your child happy? I'm not talking about when you buy them a toy or give them chocolate pudding for dessert. I mean when you're at home, doing nothing. When you're reading a book and little Jasmine is watching "Frozen" for the 500th time today. Is there a light in your child's eyes? Are they using their imaginations? Are they making friends at school? Are they reading better and better every day, or at least trying to?  Is she crying for 5 minutes instead of 20 when you drop her off at Mother's Day Out and go take that nap? Then it looks to me like you're not so bad after all.